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April 25, 2005

consequences

After reading Mark's blog last week, I was incredibly thankful that he was let off with a warning instead of the due ticket that we could not afford.

Saturday, we decided to take a quick trip to the Unclaimed Baggage store somewhere in Alabama only to get lost on the ride home--an hour past lunch time, the baby crying for a bottle, the boys fighting, me with an attitude, and Mark stressed about the wedding that he was suppose to photograph that evening. I am known to be somewhat of a fast driver and can get us where we need to be much faster than my husband who gets caught up in conversation or dreaming about his next big idea. I am also usually quick to spot lurking law enforcement but not this day. We were cruising down the road well over the speed limit trying to entertain our weary children with some old Fingerhutt songs when I notice a trooper who was obviously well aware of my transgression.

So, here we are pulled over again. This time with me behind the wheel. The boys had a multitude of questions about the whole ordeal; so I used this situation as a learning tool to teach them that even mommy is punished for bad choices. We often talk about policemen and following the rules while driving--and, I admit, scaring our children a bit with the thought of an angry policemen catching them without their seat belts on. So, Aidan especially is well aware of the officer's duty.

When the trooper came back to our car with the fat ticket in hand, Aidan quickly started trying to get his attention. He kept saying, "Umm. Mister Policeman...Excuse me, Mister Policeman." Over and over he continued with a concerned look across his face. We soon figured out that he was trying to rat Mark out for taking off his seat belt earlier in an attempt to retrieve a spider-man toy from the floor board. Then, Mark started to get nervous and tried to get Aidan's attention turned to something else. Aidan was determined, "Umm. Excuse me. Excuse me, Mister Policeman. My dad...Umm." Despite all of Aidan's efforts, the trooper was more focused on my ticket and did not hear what was being said. So, Aidan was not successful in busting his dad, but we get a good laugh at the thought of his diligence and the nervous look on Mark's face.

Posted by cooleys at 03:38 PM | TrackBack

April 20, 2005

family traditions

camping with the nichols

I love hearing stories from friends about the great things that their families did together on special occasions or just because. One of the ways that Mark and I are attempting to be intentional in our parenting is recognizing the things that we love doing as a family and setting aside times to do these things regularly. Family walks around our neighborhood, inviting friends over for dinner, hiking (and eventually camping), trips to local parks, and telling stories together are among our favorite activities.

I would like to hear about some other ideas that anyone reading may have in this area. Long stories about special family moments are welcome as well as short ideas for how to make one child in a large family feel special.

Posted by cooleys at 08:52 PM | TrackBack

April 14, 2005

the mad face

Those who know us well have heard a lot about the ongoing struggles with our four year old. Recent outbursts of anger, apparent frustration, signs of social anxiety, disregard for rules or consequence, and the compulsion to flee any circumstance that seems uncomfortable have filled our days for the past couple of weeks leaving us concerned and desperately trying to resolve some of these problems. For a time nothing was working. Aidan did not respond to discipline and was unwilling to work through problems or conflicts that arose. As with the rest of our roller coaster of a parenting experience, when we felt that we were at our end his behavior changed for the better. Now, he is the loving, compliant child that we adore. Thank you, Lord. So, after all of the days spent worrying about the situation, one expensive doctor's visit, multiple conversations with other parents, guilt, and numerous feelings of inadequacy, what should I take from this experience? I am sure that it is not uncommon for a parent to regularly overreact with their first child. I would often like to think that I have moved beyond this tendency, but I am sure that is not the case. I want the best for my children, as most parents do, and attempt to analyze each incident that comes up watching for indicators of future problems.

Posted by cooleys at 10:43 PM | TrackBack

April 08, 2005

kid art

When not marking all over themselves or the furniture, my kids can create some fun works of art on paper. I always enjoy looking through their drawings to see the progression in their ability to form figures. I also enjoy the bright colored pictures that they create.

Posted by cooleys at 12:00 PM | TrackBack

April 04, 2005

recent works by our resident artists

So, there are several specific actions that I felt "my children" would never be allowed to do. Writing on anything other than coloring books or designated pieces of paper would be one of those actions. I was sure that if I was a good enough mother or stern enough in establishing the rules, I could avoid most of these seemingly horrible things that other people's children would do regularly. Well, my children have once again proven me wrong. I would say that I have been successful with the stern rules part--though I will admit that I am lacking in complete consistency--but the boys continue to shock me with their ability to put all rules and thoughts of consequences aside for one exciting moment with a bright marker and a light-colored couch. Oh well. I do understand that this dilemma is minuscule in the greater scheme of raising children.

Posted by cooleys at 09:19 PM | TrackBack

April 02, 2005

the giver

I have been collecting flowers lately--small, beautiful flowers usually seen as mere weeds but appearing precious as they are lovingly received from the hands of my children. It is difficult to put into words how such a small action occurring daily can warm my heart despite how many times it is repeated. I suppose I am just so thankful to see love, respect, compassion...just something other than constant demands for my attention and fighting between the boys. During quiet moments in our busy day, Aidan will often come to me and say, "Mommy, you are sooo pretty. You are like a princess. I should get you wots (lots) and wots of flowers..." And he does with an excited glow covering his face each time.

Posted by cooleys at 09:41 PM | TrackBack